How to be re-elected without really trying

Do's & Don'ts of Campaign to November

Published on June 10, 2004 By noragchick In International

Seeing as I am all of a sudden reconciled to the theory that Dubya means well, I 'm considering e-mail him the following advice :-

1 Acquire pots and pots of legally obtained funds and outspend God if you have to.
2 Stop condescending to Johnny Foreigner
3 Seek no audience with the Pope
4 Stop walking like a chimpanzee. BR> 5 Lie about the economy
6 Lie about everything else
7 Don't get caught
8 Sack the psychopathic Veep, Demon Dick Cheney
9 Sack Rummy
10 Sack Sanchez 11 Stop the deranged Neo-Con rampage 12 Don't start another war this side of November 14 Tell Saudi where they can stick their oil 15 Never again repeat the assertion that God told you to run for the presidency 16 Stay away from military funerals 17 Go to more baseball games 18 Go to less press conferences 19 Don't go to military funerals 20 Get shot but don't die It'll work a treat all that

Comments

kingbee

on Jun 12, 2004

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahaha

do you realize how much money and fame await you when you start taking on candidate clients?

noragchick

on Jun 12, 2004

What?

kingbee

on Jun 13, 2004

theres a job waiting for you somewhere as campaign manager

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